For who he is
by Faceless Charmer
Summary: Just a little oneshot about Kurogane and Fai, and how Kurogane is the only one who really sees Fai as who he really is. I enjoyed writing it!


The group had landed in a nice, clean world. Mokona wasn't sure weither or not a feather was here or not, so they were staying around, asking about legends, trying to find any leads.

One day, Fai and Sakura were in the cozy kitchen of their rented house that they had found a few hours before. They were making dinner for Kurogane, Syoaran, and Mokona for when they returened from looking.

"Fai-san, do you think they'll find one of my feathers?" Sakura asked hopefully, and the mage smiled. A real smile. He had them occasionally too ya know during times like when he cooked with Sakura, talked to Syaoran, or teased Kurogane with help from Mokona.

"I believe that they will try very hard Sakura, and if they do not, they will keep searching until they find it, or, don't find, if there isn't a feather in this world. And if there isn't we'll go to the next world, and they'll search again." he answered. A simple yes or no would have done just fine for Sakura, but Fai liked to talk. Or pretended he liked to talk.

"And we'll just have to offer what ever support we can, won't we Sakura?"

Sakura smiled and nodded.

"Hai!" she said, determined now. She began cooking the food with a determination that had been buried there before, and now was comming out. Fai smiled, but this time it was one of his fake ones, and he turned back to his pot.

For a while he and Sakura cooked and chated, and a few hours later, just when they finished the food, Kurogane and Syoaran came in, Mokona trailing behind.

"We're home!" Mokona shouted, hopping over to Sakura and Fai. "We couldn't find the feather but we'll keep looking!"

"Welcome home!" Sakura said, smiling at Syaoran, who blushed momentarily then looked away. "Hime, I'm sorry that we couldn't find your feather. I promise I will." he said, but Sakura smiled at him happily. "It's okay Syoaran-kun! Now please come and taste the food that Fai-san and I made!"

Syaoran smiled, relieved that his princess was not disapointed in him. "Hai! Arigato!" he said and sat down with Sakura and Mokona to eat.

Fai on the other hand had made his way over to Kurogane.

"So you didn't find the feather yet Kuro-daddy?" he asked playfully, and Kurogane turned to scowl at him.

"Don't call me that! And no we didn't."

"Aw thats alright, I'm sure Kuro-puppy tried his very hardest didn't he?" Fai said, poking at Kurogane. Kurogane grumbled something under his breath, but Fai couldn't hear what it was. So instead he began pulling Kurogane over to the table. They all sat down and ate and talked about random things.

At one point, Sakura brought up her brother. "I miss my Onii-chan, I wish I could see him. I love him and miss him so much."

For some reason or another, Kurogane had been looking at Fai when she said it, and even though he still wore his sicking mask, for one brief moment when she said that, Kurogane saw it fade just a little. He frowned, wondering why.

At the end of dinner Fai laughed his way over to Kurogane.

"Ne, Kuro-pu did you like it? Sakura-chan and I worked real hard to make it." he asked enthusiastically, his facade never slipping off his face, stuck as if it was glued. Well, to unglue things you just had to add a little water.

"Oi Mage, when Sakura brought up her brother, for a moment there, you looked different. Your face changed. Why?" Kurogane watched as Fai's mask slipped off and his eyes widened. He placed his hand over his heart for one moment before smiling again, a very painful smile. Kurogane knew it was painful because what Fai obviously wanted to do most was break down and cry.

"Kuro-chan's always watching isn't he?" Fai said but he didn't answer Kurogane's question and fled, a little to fast, up the stairs and into his room. Sakura went into a bathroom to change. This is when a problem was brought to Syaoran's attention.

"Um, Kurogane-san, there are only two bedrooms, where will every one sleep?" he asked sorta timidly, mostly because Kurogane looked very pissed.

"Tch." Kurogane scoffed. "How the hell should I know!" he shouted at the boy, who twitched noticably.

"Gomen Kurogane-san!" he said, and Kurogane instantly felt bad. He took a deep breath.

"Sorry kid." he said. "That mage just has me in a foul mood, I didn't mean to take it out on you."

Syoaran smiled. "That's alright Kurogane-san! I'll just ask the hime where she would like to sleep." And with that, they young boy warrior ran of to find his most important person so that he could ask her if she'd rather sleep with a hyper, loud, alcholic wizard, an angry, killer soilder, or him.

Kurogane took this time to think, and decided he would go talk to Fai again. He walked up the stairs and opened the first door he came to, no knocking or anything.

Kurogane's eyes widened as he noticed that Fai was not wearing a shirt, as he had just been in the middle of changing. Fai gasped.

"Kuro-Kuro-chan!" he stammered and Kurogane quickly turned the other direction. Fai put on his shirt and blushing a smidge, walked over to him.

"Did you want something?" he asked, not using a ridicolous nickname. His voice was lower, the voice he used when he was serious. He noticed his own mistake and quickly smiled.

"I was just comming up to tell you that you and I will probably end up in the same room."

"Well thats okay Kuro-wan, cause now it won't be uncomfortable since you saw that. Ne, ne, did you get a good peek?" Fai said playfully, poking at Kurogane's arm and Kurogane felt his anger boil.

"You shut up or I'll kill you!" he shouted at Fai, who laughed and jumped into his bed. As things turned out, Kurogane did in fact end up sleeping with Fai in the same room.

A week passed and there was still no sign of the feather. But Syoaran wanted to make sure before they left, so they planned on staying a while longer.

One day, Fai was working in the garden of their house. He enjoyed attending to it, it made him feel happy. Syoaran was out with Sakura and Mokona, and Kurogane was out training.

Suddenly Fai felt a presence looming over him and he looked behind him.

"Kuro-chan! You gave me a heart attack." he said, jumping up and running to the ninja. Kurogane 'tch'ed, but Fai did not falter.

"I'm having so much fun here Kuro-tan, how about you?" Fai asked.

"I can see your trying real hard to look like you are."

Fai froze. No. Not this again. His smile faltered, only for a brief second, but Kurogane caught it.

"What ever do you mean Kuro-chan, I'm very happy." Fai said his smile never fading. It made Kurogane sick to his stomach to see a person in so much pain try so hard to act this way.

"Stop it.'' he growled. "Stop pretending your happy, I'm not stupid. Even if you pretend your happy, I can see that your not."

Fai turned the other direction. He wasn't smiling now. He took a deep and broken breath.

"Listen mage," Kurogane continued. "Those kids look up to you and count on you for help. I don't know who your running from and like I've said before, I don't care, but for God's sake, let people see your pain!"

Fai suddenly broke into a sprint. He had to get away. If he didn't, he would break down. But Kurogane grabbed his wrist in an unbreakable grip. Fai tried to pull his arm out but Kurogane held tight. Fai did not want to hear this. But Kurogane was going to make sure he did.

"You don't have to hide your pain and act this way! Its sickening!"

Suddenly Fai crumpled to his knees. Kurogane recoiled in suprise. Fai turned his head and Kurogane gasped. Long tears were trailing down Fai's face and he used his one free arm to cover his eyes.

Kurogane didn't know what to do now.

"Mage?" he asked, but Fai did not reply. He only sobbed harder.

"A-are y-y-ou happ-happy n-now?" Fai finally stammered at Kurogane and Kurogane was confused. "H-happy t-t-that y-you've s-s-seen m-my p-pain?"

Kurogane felt momentary shock. No, this wasn't what he wanted. He didn't want to see Fai so upset and hurt to the point that he thought Kurogane was doing it JUST to see him hurt. He tried to pull the blond to his feet but Fai ripped his hand from Kurogane's and cried harder.

"Y-you don't understand!" he shouted at Kurogane. Then he sobbed, in a broken whisper, "Onii-chan, Onii-chan."

Kurogane froze in suprise. Onii-chan? Fai had a brother?

But he didn't have time to ask becuase Fai suddenly got up and ran. Kurogane didn't try to catch him this time.

Chappie 2

Fai ran up the stairs and into the room he and Kurogane shared. He shut the door and began to lock it with some magic, magic that Kurogane could not break. He ran to his bed and threw the blankets over his head.

"Fai." he sobbed. "Fai."

There was complete silence for a moment as Fai waited to see if there would be an answer to his weeping. But there was none. So resumed his sobs.

Syaoran walked through the door, a smile on his face, Sakura with one to match.

"Kurogane-san!" Syaoran shouted to him, and Kurogane turned. In Syaoran's hand was a feather. Sakura was bouncing behind him happily.

"We found the feather!" Syaoran said, just incase it wasn't obvious. Kurogane raised his eyebrows in a, 'no duh,' kind of manner. But then he started up the stairs.

"I'll go get the mage." he said. He started up the stairs and when he reached the room they shared he was shocked that when he tried to open the door, he found it was locked.

"Oi! Mage, unlock this door!" he shouted.

"Maybe I don't want to." a low voice said. It was Fai's serious voice and it sounded like it was coming from right on the other side of the door. Like Fai was leaning right on the other side.

"They found the feather, we gotta go!"

"......."

"Come on before I break the door down!"

"Kurogane-san, is everything alright? Is Fai alright?" Sakura asked, coming up the stairs with a worried expression. Only Kurogane could hear Fai whisper, 'Sakura!' as he realized it was her. The door flew open and a smiling Fai came out the door.

"Don't worry Sakura-chan, I'm fine!"

Sakura didn't look convinced for a moment but then she smiled.

"Lets go!"

Kurogane watched Fai run down the stairs. Only he saw the pain in his smile. Only he saw the tears in his happy eyes. Only he saw the grimace behind his run. Only he saw the mage for who he really was.


End file.
